Adjustments
by Simon920
Summary: Alec returns to Hopeful Farn after his wedding. Pam is delayed for a few days. This story is based on the original books but assumes that Pam's car accident never happened.


Disclaimers: These guys aren't mine, they don't belong to me, worst luck, so don't bother me.

Archive: Fine, but if you want it, please ask first.

Feedback: Hell, yes.

**Adjustments**

Bill Ramsay knocked lightly on his son's office door in the training barn. It was about eight-thirty in the morning and he hadn't seen Alec in days. Well, he'd seen him around the farm but he hadn't had the chance to really talk to the young man since he'd gotten back from Florida a few days ago. He wasn't even sure where he was eating because he hadn't joined them for meals in the main house. "Alec? Are you busy?"

The door was ajar, Alec sitting in the leather chair at his desk. He turned with a small smile as soon as his father spoke. "No, not really. Come on in, sit down." He seemed to have just been looking out the window at the horses in the field. There was a half filled coffee cup on the desk beside him.

"So…" He usually wasn't at a loss for words with Alec but the last few months Alec had changed so much he was a little unsure and he didn't like the feeling, it was almost as if he was losing touch his son and speaking with a stranger. "…How's Pam?"

"I just spoke with her; she's fine. She said that she expects to be here in about a week and a half." He shifted in his chair, trying to hide his disappointment. "She was supposed to be here at the end of the week but her horse has a minor respitory infection and they want to make sure she's over it before she's shipped. It look like I'm taking a back seat to an elderly mare." He gave a small, rueful smile and Bill Ramsay was struck again by how besotted his son was with his new bride. The renewed realization was a two edged sword as far as he was concerned; on one hand he was thrilled and pleased that his son had found happiness with Pam. On the other hand he knew this proved—as if he needed any more evidence, that his son was no longer a child in any sense of the word but a man with his own concerns and responsibilities. And now he had his own family.

Alec's thoughts were similar to his father's but from the other side of the fence. He loved his parents, of course, but now he had Pam to care about and she was the most important person in his life. Part of him could hardly believe his luck in finding her and at the same time he had a tremendous fear of losing her. She would never walk out on him, he was confident of that, but he was afraid that the farm would prove to be too quiet for her, that she would need to find more adventures and excitement. He wouldn't stop her—even if he wanted to he knew he couldn't—and that she would do what she needed to. Having so much work to do at the farm and when they were racing, he wouldn't often be able to go with her and that worried him more than he would admit, even to himself.

"Your mother wants to have some kind of party or reception for you two when Pam gets here if that's all right with you, so everyone can meet her. And I know there are a lot of friends who want to give you two their congratulations."

Alec smiled. "Sure, I had to go through it when I was down in Florida. Fair's fair." Besides, he knew his mother probably missed out on being able to be involved in a big wedding with all the flowers and clothes and all of that. This might help make it up to her a little bit.

"There are a lot of people asking what you want for wedding gifts. Have you come up with any answers for that one?"

Alec laughed—this was just so strange. "No. I don't care; anything, I guess. Pam may have some ideas when she gets here, I'll ask her to think about what she might like." He turned serious after a few moments. "When you and Mom first got married, what as it like?"

"Alec?" He saw that his father didn't understand what he meant.

"It's like I'm happy, really happy. I think about her all the time, even when we were together in Europe and Florida she was almost the only thing on my mind. When I rode the Flamingo all I could think about was that I wanted it to be finished with so I could get back to her." He saw the look on his father's face. "No, it didn't affect my riding or my work on the track but in the jockey room, during the interviews—all I could think about was how much I wanted to be with her." He laughed, a little self-conscious. "I guess I sound like I have it bad, don't I?"

Alec's father smiled. "I felt the same way when I was a newlywed. Sometimes, even after all these years she'll walk into the room and it hits me all over again. But you know how I feel about your mother, don't you?"

"Of course, sure I do." He paused and picked up his coffee cup. "But…" He stopped, shaking his head a little as if he wasn't sure what he wanted to say.

Bill knew that he'd talk when he was ready and there was no point in trying to force anything. "Where are you two going to stay when she gets here, have you given that any thought? Up in your room?"

Alec pulled himself out of whatever was bothering him and shook his head. "The apartment over the yearling barn. It's the biggest and I thought I'd use part of the Flamingo winnings to fix it up. Eventually I'd like to build a house here on the property, not too big or anything but I think Pam would like that." He finished his coffee. "I guess we might have to stay in the main house for a while if we have some work done to the apartment, come to think of it."

Bill was quiet again, yes, Pam probably would like to have her own home but something was bothering Alec and he couldn't put his finger on it. "When is Henry getting back?" He was expected sometime this week, but Bill wasn't sure when.

"He got back last night, I was talking to him". Alec looked at the coffee mug. "He brought me this about half an hour ago, thought I needed it." He smiled at that; Henry wasn't as gruff as he pretended to be. "I rode three of the two year olds this morning and he's decided to hold them back for another year, race them next year, let them have some more seasoning."

Alec was changing the subject to business and they stayed on that subject for a few more minutes with Bill telling his son that they'd be needing whatever stud fees they could get for running expenses. The training track needed some major work, a new barn was on the list and if he wanted to put money into the apartment they would be stretched financially. Bill got up and made his way over to the door. "Stop by the house, will you? Your mother would like to make sure you're all right."

Alec nodded. "I'll be there for dinner." Mom was always Mom no matter how old he was, always worried he wasn't dressed warmly enough or that he wasn't eating but he promised that he would see her today.

Outside in the barn itself Bill could hear the hands mucking stalls and hosing down the concrete floor. Horses were being led outside so they could spend the day in one of the fields and he knew that Alec never seemed to have enough time to get through everything in a given day. He was clearly stressed by the last few years of big time racing, along with some setbacks they'd suffered. Pam might just be the solution he and Alec's mother had been hoping for. He'd been too tightly wound, too tense and hadn't been taking enough time for himself or with friends, time to relax and it had taken a serious toll. They'd become increasingly concerned and now, if Alec was worried about something concerning his new marriage, that could be a problem if it wasn't resolved.

A few hours later Alec was on his computer going through horse genealogies when Henry came in and leaned over his shoulder. "Anything interesting?"

Alec replied without looking up. "I think we should raise both Black and Satan's fees. We're getting a hundred and fifty thousand for each of them now and I don't see any reason why we can't ask two and a half."

Henry grunted. "You're getting greedy. No one will pay that much."

"Sure they will. Black is the most successful stakes racer in history and Satan is a Triple Crown winner. How much was Alydar getting—over a hundred thousand before he was put down, right? You know as well as I do that both of our horses are better studs than he was. This is a no brainer and we'd be stupid not to ask for more than we're getting now."

Henry really looked at Alec and realized all over again that the green as grass teenager he'd first worked with years ago was gone forever. This young man was a hard headed business man as well as a topnotch horseman. And he'd been doing his homework; Henry had thought about raising their fees but had been hesitant, still thinking back when the best a top horse could hope for was a two or three thousand but those days were long gone. Plus, they needed the money. Fine, Alec was right. They'd raise the fees. "All right, put the notices up and we'll tell any new bookings that the rates have gone up."

"When do you need me back at the track?"

"Aquaduct? Friday, race on Saturday." Alec nodded. "You going to be okay?"

"What?" Alec finally glanced up. He had an idea what Henry was talking about but wasn't going to jump into anything.

"You know what I mean. I need your attention on the business at hand, not Pam. I don't want you getting hurt and neither does she." Henry heaved himself to his feet and went out to check on the new feed order but turned and closed the office door so they'd have privacy. "You've been sloppy and distracted the last couple of months and that's not doing any of us any good including the horses. You've got a wife to think about now, but you've got to learn how to put her out of your mind when you have more immediate things to deal with—and I'm telling you this for your own good, even though I know you're going to be sore about it."

Alec didn't say anything but was seething inside. This weekend his attention would be on the race and there was a fair chance that he'd win the thing. He was a professional and knew his job. He'd be fine, no matter what Henry might think.

Ale spent the rest of the morning going over paperwork with his father regarding the farm, availible funds and then several hours on the phone finalizing several new stud agreements. They would put over a million dollars in the farm's coffers if everything worked out the way they hoped and each mating resulted in a live birth. It was a lot of money but it amazed him how fast it would go; they wanted to do all the repairs and additions around the farm plus wanting to buy another hundred acres. That short list would eat up just about all that money almost before they even had time to count it. And he tried not to think about the fact that while he'd ridden three horses early that morning, he'd spent the rest of the day in an office, talking on the phone and working on a computer.

Around six he made his way over to the main house as his mother was pulling a roasted chicken out of the oven. Happy to see him, she kissed his cheek and finished preparing the meal while she plied him with endless questions about his trip to see Pam in Europe, their elopement and then his two weeks meeting her family down in Florida. He was privately amused that she didn't ask him anything about the Flamingo Stakes, which he'd won a few days ago but that was like her—caring about everything he did and assuming that the racing was fine unless she heard otherwise.

The family dinner was fine, but it wasn't the same as it used to be. He made small talk with his parents, told them about the small wedding with Pam and just her friends there as witnesses, he told them about the short honeymoon they'd taken in a rented car down to Italy and then the two weeks he'd spent in Florida meeting Pam's family. Alec felt odd, though, as he was sitting there, eating his mother's familiar food. Then he realized that tonight was different because while his parents seemed exactly the same, he'd changed. They were still his parents and he was still their son of course, but it was different and for the first time in his life he almost felt like a visitor in what had been his own home for years. He tried to understand and suddenly realized that it was because it was no longer his home—his home was with Pam and it a few days she'd be here. They'd be setting up their own place, selecting their own belongings, arranging their own household.

"Alec?"

"…Excuse me?" His mind had been wandering.

"I asked when Pam would be here, has she arranged her flight yet?"

He looked at his mother. "I spoke to her just before dinner; she's coming in on Sunday at about six. She'll have her mare with her so I'll be driving the small trailer down that afternoon." He took a drink from his water glass. "Come to think of it, I'll be at Aquaduct on Saturday; I might as well stay over then go from there, save myself the extra miles."

His mother nodded, she was happy for anything which would make things a little easier for Alec; he worked so hard. "My goodness, this is going to be a change for everyone, isn't it? But, you know—I've never said this to either of you, but all these years I've always secretly wished I had a daughter along with you, Alec. You two have no idea what it's like to be the only female on the farm. I'll finally have someone to have girl talk with and I can't wait!"

Alec and his father exchanged a look but both decided to let that comment go and Alec smothered a smile. A few hours later Alec returned to the main house after a long walk though the fields to find his mother sitting on a rocker on the porch. He sat on the railing beside her. She picked up his hand and looked at the new wedding ring on his finger, a simple gold band. "You miss her, don't you, Alec?"

"More than I've ever missed anyone." He paused for a second, afraid that he'd sound stupid or childish. "Have you ever missed someone so much you actually ached?"

She looked a little sad for a moment. "When you were missing on that island with the Black and we thought you'd been drowned when that ship sank, you were hardly more than a little boy then. I thought…well, I though I'd never really feel whole again but then you came back to us. I remember how I felt, though."

There had been other times he'd caused his parents to worry, to think he was lost for good and he'd felt guilty about that for a long time. They'd never spoken about it though. "I'm sorry about some of the things I've put you and Dad through. I know some of this has been hard on you two."

She almost nodded, but not quite. "I'm happy you've found Pam, Alec. I think you're good for one another."

"How?" He really wanted to know what his mother thought.

"You ground her and she sets you free." She stood up. "Don't forget to turn out the lights when you come in, all right." Then she leaned over and did something she hadn't done in a very long time; she kissed him good night.

TBC

1/23/07

7


End file.
